In the wee hours of Friday morn the planet silently slipped off its axis, jettisoning us all into an alternate reality.
In this alternate universe, Zane is too focused on other worldly concerns to make football picks, Mike’s soccer team wins championships, Claire — the once student of the month — traipses around neighborhoods looking like a bozo and asking for handouts, and the Lions are the darlings of sports radio.
And in this bizarro world, Peter the not so Great defeats the opening act at a 65 and over dive bluegrass bar (the Clark/Chris combo) for weekly football picking supremacy.
Yes, in this world of whack, our man about campus even sports tweed blazers, pledges Sigma Chi and trades Tricia in for a Tri-Delt. (OK, maybe not the Greek part — even Bizarro worlds have their plausible limits).
Will the shackles of this Schrodinger hell be shook off and normalcy re-established? Or are we fated to while away our remaining days in a world where all mental strata must be reconstructed?
Stay tuned….
See results below.
-The Commish
Click on table to view full size
FROM CHRIS/CLARK
To the Commissioner:
I got a call from Clarke from a Blues bar, drinking a coke and contemplating his first drink of cherry coke in 31 years after receiving the news after another losing week. He stated, “just because I was born south of the mason dixon line, doesn’t mean I’m married to my cousin (Bluegrass) and I know that when things are this close, I’m entitled to a recount and a polling of the jury if necessary.” He continued, “I hope we don’t have to file suit in district court (jurisdiction because the parties live in several states). Let’s keep it sportsmanlike”.
We await your response….
FROM PETE
Heeheeheheee! I enjoyed this email immensely. Feels good to bask in the tub of random-pick induced football glory